Poopee

Question from Tabatha.


I dunno about your metabolism(s), but with mine, I drink I piss, I eat I shit. Same as the monkeys except I have opposable thumbs so I wipe my arse. I've also never thrown my poo like monkeys do, however tempted I may get.

Now, I'm hoping it's not actually possible, but I've never had poo come out of my peehole. This is good. Sometimes when you're sick, it feels like gushing pee coming out the other end, but that's ok, most semi-solids**can be turned into liquid quite easily.

Unprocessed consumed things turn into waste matter, then going to your bowel or your bladder. How does it do that though?? Is your kidney like some kind of spongey filter that lets liquid drown out the bottom then when it fills up with poo it tips over and drops it into your bowel or what? I really don't understand (see diagram).

Now, I actually did ask some people this, their answer was: kidney. Didn't really answer the question though, as I don't think their biological knowledge is adequate enough to tell me.

**Actually there's another question, is poo a solid or what? When you step on it it squishes, and I'm assuming for the sake of world sewage it turns to liquid in the drains?

See, to the best of my knowledge, (which is none, hence the question), it all comes in mixed, then the pee filters through into the bladder, then when there's enough poo it tilts that thing backwards to drop it into the bowel. So another question, there's pee in your poo isn't there??

How does your arsehole know you're home?

Imagine this scenario.

You're at work, you've just finished. Home's only around the corner. You need to pee kinda. You need to shit. Like neeeeeeed to shit! You can hold it. "I'd rather turd in my own bowl, much more comfortable." Those are your thoughts. Things are going well thus far, although you need to pee more. In the privacy of your car you've squeezed out a couple of farts that you were too nervous to do in front of other people you know, just in case. When you realise you haven't crapped in your pants and you get that gas-that's-gone-thru-shit-before-exiting-my-anus smell, you're kinda disappointed you didn't give the boys at work the last goodbye. You still need to pee. Busting for that crap though, but you're ok. Now you're home, you're in the driveway, you're sitting in the drivers seat bobbing up and down chanting "hang on hang on" to yourself while you get the front door key ready before you get out so you're in quicker. Do you know why you do this? You've held it fine. Then you get to the front door, and you will, repeat you will, for some reason fumble with your keys, and take about 10 tries to unlock a door that's normally easy. Now you're convinced you've just shit yourself. You had to go bad, but not that bad. Until now. When you're right at your front door. Your arsehole knows this and opens slightly. It knows you're home.

How the fuck does it know that?